Dear Gladiolus dalenii:
I have this blog (an ugly word, I know), and a while back I hinted that something really exciting was going to happen in the little garden by the front window. That’s right, the one you’re in.
I was talking about you. You bloomed last year, and you were so spectacular that airplanes flying overhead slowed down to look at you. A huge spike of red-orange and yellow flowers, remember? That’s why I planted you, for flowers. Not just to sit there and look like any number of plants with sword-shaped leaves.
Yes, I know it hasn’t been raining, and the soil you’re growing in is not terrific, but that’s no excuse, because I can see that you’re five times bigger than last year, so–do the math–there should be five times as many flower spikes as last year. Not none, five times as many.
That was Blossom Booster I sprinkled on you the other day. So what if it probably expired in 1973? It’s the thought that counts. And you do get watered. Let’s see some action here.
Yours truly,
the person who can dig you up and give you away if you don’t do what I want.
the miserable gardener 
Funny that I’m reading your blog every evening before retiring. I barely even know you and you have become part of my bedtime routine!
Can’t wait to see what becomes of that newly raked north end. This is better than any soap opera, Bob.
Maybe you should talk nicer to Madame Gladiolus?
Excellent post! Oh and if polite reasoning doesn’t work maybe taking the shovel and laying it next to Ms G might do the trick?
I’m just bluffing, as usual. I got the gladiolus from Seneca Hill, and so it serves as a reminder of what a cool nursery that was.
I might dig it up and divide it, next year, so the corms can compete with each other.
Bob
Laughed out loud!
Gave away the gladiolus. I should have dug it up and divided it, because it had several healthy corms, but gave it away instead…..
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